I did some research and found out the diagnosis for two related medical conditions that occur in
FREE water drinkers.
One is a somewhat common birth defect..
Called....Short Arms....Deep Pockets....
The other requires an operation to surgically remove your wallet. You sat on it so long it became imbedded.
DISCLAIMER: Please consult a board certified Physician for a second opinion. The above was a
FREE non medical opinion.
OK Wolf here is your assignment.
To prove that bars get
FREE water.
1. Go to the store and get bag of
FREE lemons. They are just taking up space for the more expensive
FREE items stores are constantly giving away.
(I want a set of grocery store shelves in my kitchen. They are magically full again every morning.) What a country...
2. Get a
FREE solar electric panel big enough to make
FREE electricity to run your
FREE refrigerator, with Ice Maker. Obama has them on his new green web site. And you qualify for a
FREE tax deduction.
3. Next to prove the entire USA has
FREE water and sewerage treatment facilities. You will need a set of wire cutters and 2 pipe wrenches. These are
FREE at the hardware store. Take these tools to the cellar and locate the
FREE water meter. Carefully cut the water company's locking wire seal on the nut. And use the 2 pipe wrenches to loosen the threaded nuts. Now turn the
FREE water meter around backwards and re-install it. Don't worry about replacing the seal...it's
FREE, too.
4. Now in the kitchen...slice a
FREE lemon into wedges. Don't forget to wash the lemon with more
FREE water. Grab a nice clean glass from the
FREE dishwasher and fill it up with
FREE water and
FREE ice. Don't forget the
FREE lemon garnish. MMMMMmmmm looks so refreshingly
FREE.
5. Take the refreshingly ice cold
FREE water drink into the bathroom and dump it down the toilet.
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Empty it completely...we wouldn't want to waste any, it's
FREE. Now flush the refreshingingly
FREE drink down the drain.
Now Repeat these 5 steps 2-3-4-5-6 times to represent the amount of
FREE water drinks you consume nightly at your favorite karaoke bar. Don't forget to add up all your
FREE time involved in repeating these steps. Everyone works for
FREE.
Do this everyday for an entire year. And show us your
FREE yearly water & sewage bills. Then multiply it by several
FREE water drinkers per night. Because they travel in preditory packs.
I can't wait to see how big and
FREE...FREE really is.
Oh and the big "GUILT TIP" for the waitress that served the
FREE drinks all night....That money goes into her pocket. She doesn't give it to the bar owner to make up for your night of
FREE indulgences. It didn't help the bar owner pay one penny toward anything. He still
HATES you.
So take this to the bank.....there is no
FREE lunch or
FREE water or
FREE entertainment or anything else
FREE in this world. A water drinker is taking up good space for a paying customer that could be paying for your
FREE water by
PURCHASING food and drinks, while you're listening to the
FREE entertainment he could be helping to pay for.