Drill Sargent Singing Voice

Bigdog · Post by **Bigdog** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 4:01 am

Tonight was slow starting out. The bartenders/managers have me doing 9-1 and the crowd always comes late. I suggested many months ago that a switch in time to 9:30 -1:30 would be better. They both said no. So It's 9-1.

Have a guy that is becoming a regular at this bar. He sings almost exclusively slow songs. He can hit the notes alright but he sings them like a Drill Sargent. I can't think of any other way to describe it.

Songs like: Babe - Styx...If - Bread.... Wonderful Tonight - Clapton

These are beautiful loves songs and he makes them sound like it's marching drill time. His voice is not soft and tender as in the songs. It's harsh and powerful and raw. No smoothness at all. No tenderness. And his word timing is slightly off. Either too slow or speeding to catch up. Are we getting a mental picture of this?

Slow songs are much more crowd tolerable when the singer is good.

Tonight he had some people with him and every song he did he turned toward them to sing. I don't know if it was to see their reaction or if he was performing.. Ouch.....for them.

Anyway, back to the slow start....Me & him for the first 10 songs. Then me, him and one other for a few rounds. The other singer ranks only slightly better.

Then he wouldn't bring up the next slip till i was in the middle of my song. Now I have to sing and one finger type. After seeing his next song was another slow song I had to keep on switching my songs to break it up. All in the name of trying to keep the nonsingers happy. Some were leaving. I don't know if it was the singing or lack of women...

We did get more people but he stayed till 12:15 or so. The rotation go up to 14-15. So that helped too.

Sabrina59 · Post by **Sabrina59** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 5:31 am

And a good time was had by all.

I can't imagine a nice, slow, soft love song done as a Drill Sargent. Wow.

Sounds like one of hubby's friend. The man is in his 50's but trying to recapture his youth (even going as far as having an affair with one of the other regulars

). He actually does a decent job of the yelly-screamy rock songs ... but every rock song he sings he does the same way, regardless of how the original artist did it.

I guess it's better than his regular singing voice though ... although he will tell you he sings very well because he took voice classes all through college.

But, in all actuality ... the man can't sing.

Which brings up another subject. When I am singing a song, I can tell if it sounds good or if I am butchering it (yes, I do butcher the occasional song ... hard to imagine, I know [we really need an angelic emoticon]). How is is that people who sound terrible don't know it?!?!

I'm not talking about the person who can't carry a tune in a bucket, and knows it, but sings anyway because it's fun. I don't mind these folks singing ... it adds to the "fun" factor.

I'm talking about the people who sound worse than a cat in heat but think they sound great.

Can't they hear themselves? I've met some incredibly pretentious people, who think they are great, but apparently are deaf.

DanG2006 · Post by **DanG2006** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 9:34 am

Probably they are tone deaf and if they sound the same on every song I can gurrantee that every song sounds the same to them.

cowboydarryl · Post by **cowboydarryl** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 9:36 am

Boy I hear ya there!
Thats the million $ question LOL. The ones with the hot air balloon planted firmly on their shoulders,you can tell sometimes as soon as they hand you a slip!

Post by **wiseguy** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 3:04 pm

I feel your pain Bigdog.

A couple weekends ago there was a concert that everyone went to that left me without my usual singers for the first hour and a half. In the meantime I got to rotate songs between myself and an older woman who only sings Patsy Cline songs. I truly despise Patsy Cline's songs and having to listen to that many, and done badly, was a karaoke nightmare come true.

Bigdog · Post by **Bigdog** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 4:17 pm

Which brings up another subject. When I am singing a song, I can tell if it sounds good or if I am butchering it (yes, I do butcher the occasional song ... hard to imagine, I know [we really need an angelic emoticon]). How is is that people who sound terrible don't know it?!?!

This also pertains to the majority of working KJs. All the ones with crappy sounding systems that think they sound wonderful. Why can't they hear the difference? I think it's because it's them. Whether it's ego or ignorance.

It's a big mystery to me. I haven't been able to figure it out.

I have a cute girl that comes out and everytime she sings she is a half step flat. People get a mind set going and nothing breaks the perception. If the crowd goes nuts clapping at the end of the song whether it's because it was good or....because you are done...it all sounds the same.

Sabrina59 · Post by **Sabrina59** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 5:11 pm

Which brings up yet another subject ...

A lousy singer can do a really bad job on a popular song and the crowd goes wild. A really good singer can do a knock out job on a mediocre song and get "courtesy" applause.

It's more about which song is performed than it is about how well you can sing ... that's karaoke!

And lest any of our customers happen to be reading this ... we love you no matter how well you sing.

Bigdog · Post by **Bigdog** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 5:18 pm

Sabrina59 · Post by **Sabrina59** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 5:25 pm

How about the powerhouse singers that can't control their voice? People LOVE them!?!? Yes, it's nice to have a lot of power behind your voice ... but I'm more impressed by the person who can control it rather than "yelling" the entire song.

But we love you guys too.

Bigdog · Post by **Bigdog** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 5:34 pm

He can hit the notes I just think there are more upbeat songs better suited to his "style." Dump the slow songs...Pllleeeeaaassseeee.

Sabrina59 · Post by **Sabrina59** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 7:12 pm

Have you suggested another song for him to sing? Something along the lines of ... with your voice I bet you could do a really good job singing (insert song title here).

By the way ... I see what you did about getting back on topic.

Bigdog · Post by **Bigdog** » Thu Jun 11, 2009 9:54 pm

spotlightjr · Post by **spotlightjr** » Fri Jun 12, 2009 5:39 pm

It seems to me that the people who think they can sing but really cant are the biggest divas at my shows. You know the ones who ask you to drop it a "full key" because they cant sing that high and then you accommodate them only to find that they sing so monotone the whole time that it wouldn't have made a difference what key they sang it in?
Or the singer who performs his song and afterwards only gets the obligatory "golf clap" and tells you that it wasn't the version he usually sings and you look at him in amazement because you know that he has unfortunately sang this same version 30 times previously at your shows only to get the same response.
Maybe its the girl who arrives at your show a few hours after its started and wants to sing a song (usually carrie underwood) that has been performed once or even twice earlier and you politely tell her that but she insists on singing it and promises it will be better than the others. Of course, you suggest an alternative song as to not start any commotion with the other singers and she persists non-stop and you finally give in. Later on this girl comes up and tells you before her performance that she is gonna bring it and turn up her mic, effects, etc. cause she's gonna "blow this place up". You pretend (as usual) to pump up the volume as she belts out her first note and realize that she is hopelessly tone deaf. Not only is she tone deaf but she is screaming into the mic as loud as she can to show you how much better she is than the others who tried before her. Need I go on.......

Bigdog · Post by **Bigdog** » Fri Jun 12, 2009 6:45 pm

That's the word I'm looking for.."Power Screaming."

Yelling out with full force on key.... especially useful on power ballads

A form of crowd torture...worse than waterboarding.

Causing crowds to immediately confess to anything.

And beg for forgiveness.

Sabrina59 · Post by **Sabrina59** » Mon Jun 15, 2009 2:48 am

Or go outside to have a cigarette.